Things that fail at life.

..Freaking.. I pressed enter when I typed in the title and for a split second I had posted up an empty blog.

ANYWAY.

Things that fail at life, or rather, ONE THING THAT FAILS.

Thefreakinggoddamnedkiterunnermygodstabmeintheeyesplease.
See if you can read that without throwing up, then afterward, go read the Kite Runner. It's super shit.

Now, I don't want to hear a group of people raving to me about how great it is, how "TOUCHING" the story is.. It's as touching as Aseff and Sohrab HAHAH am I right? Okay, yeah I went there. Anyway. Let me give you a run down of the story.

- AMIR HAS Mammary-ees (BEWBIES-EES) of his childhood yadda yadda
- Reveals to us that, being the little prickish twelve year old he is, let his "servant/friend/halfbrother" get raped in the bootay by some halfie tard whose all into ethnic cleansing.. his name is Assef .. lol "ASS" "F' .. ass frick? OKAY I JUST REALISED THAT D:
- ANYWAY, he does some shit, frames him for a theft, servant friend leaves
- Amir and his dad (WHO SUPRISINGLY HATES HIM AS MUCH AS I DO, BUT FOR OTHER REASONS, PEH) run off to America, Sorry, Forgot to mention they live in Afghanistan. or pakistan. I forget. ANYWAY. They form a bond - finally.
- Amir gets married to some chick.. who, as my teacher puts it, is "tainted goods" something about her running off with some druggee boy franz.
- Dad dies (hurray, the dad is a prick)
- Some family friend calls, basically tells Amir he knew about teh RAPeZORZ
- YEAH.. shit happens, finds out the friendbrotherservant hybrid died, left a kid, Amir goes and saves kid from the evil clutches of AssFrick.. "suprise surprise"
- Genius Amir promises kid that he doesnt ever have to go to the orphanage.. lulz.. then he has to be all likes, LOL BRA, SORRY ABOUT THATS LULZ, YOU GOTTA GO BACK.. YES BACK TO TEH PLACE WHERE TEH TALLYVANS PICKERED YOU UP AND RAPPERED YOU ^_^
- Kid tries to kill himself. They go to America. IN THE END THEY GO KITE FLYING AND EVERYTHING WORKS OUT, SORT OF.

THING IS WITH THIS STORY.. EVERYTHING FITS PERFECTLY.
- Amir has to redeem himself, and the crazy tallyvan guy is "assfrick". AND BY DEFEATING ASS FRICK AMIR DEFEATS HIS GUILT AND SOMETHING ABOUT STANDING UP FOR HASSAN. FINALLY.
- Servantbrotherhybrid's mammy comes back.. she ran off yadda, Amir meets a beggar.. who knows his mother? like.. that in a way she has come back?
- THERE WERE MORE STUFF, BUT I CBF.
- OH YEAH, HASSAN AND SERVANTBROHYBRID LOVE RUNNING KITES.. AND IN THE END WHEN THE KID AND HASSAN RUN KITES, THE KID SMILES? IT'S LIKE.. SO FREAKING.. PERFECTORZ.

I'm sorry, none of this is actually coherent. The sac is on Monday. i.e tomorrow. BLAH.